The Christmas season can be a wonderful time of year, filled with festive gatherings, meals out and parties. However, for many people, this time of socialising can also bring on anxiety, especially in social settings like Christmas parties. If you struggle with social anxiety, don’t worry, there are strategies you can use before, during and after the event to help you manage those nerves. In today’s blog post, I’ll guide you through some simple yet effective techniques to help you feel more confident and at ease during this busy time of year.
Before the Event: Preparation is Key
One of the most important ways to deal with social anxiety is by preparing for the event. The more you prepare, the less you’ll feel overwhelmed or anxious on the day. Here are a few things you can do ahead of time to ease your anxiety:
- Check the venue details: If you’re going to a restaurant, take a look at the menu beforehand. If you have dietary restrictions, like Coeliac Disease (which I personally deal with), make sure the restaurant can accommodate you. You might even want to call ahead to confirm they can cater to your needs.
- Plan your travel: If driving to the event causes anxiety, make sure you know the directions and parking situation in advance. If possible, organise a lift or arrange a taxi. Knowing exactly where you’re going and how to get there can ease a lot of stress.
- Choose your outfit: Think about what you’re going to wear and how comfortable it will make you feel. A comfortable outfit can boost your confidence and reduce anxiety about your appearance.
- Think about your company: If you’re attending the event with friends or colleagues, try to arrange your travel with them, so you have a support system in place. Having someone familiar around can help you feel more at ease.
The key is to prepare as much as possible for any situation that might cause you anxiety. This way, you’ve already mentally addressed the potential challenges, making it easier to relax on the day.
Visualise Success Before You Go
Visualisation is a powerful tool for building confidence and easing anxiety. In the days leading up to the event, take a few moments each day to imagine everything going well. Picture yourself attending the event, whether it’s a dinner at a restaurant or a lively party, and visualise each aspect in as much detail as possible:
- Visualise the journey: Think about driving, parking, walking into the venue and even choosing your food if that’s something that triggers anxiety.
- Picture yourself feeling calm and confident: Imagine yourself socialising with ease, enjoying the conversations and feeling happy and relaxed.
Doing this exercise regularly can trick your mind into believing that you’ve already successfully navigated the event, which can make the real experience less intimidating. The more you visualise, the more confident you’ll feel when it’s time to face the event.
During the Event: Stay Present with Mindfulness and Affirmations
Once you’re at the event, it’s important to stay present and calm. There are two techniques you can use to manage anxiety in the moment:
- Mindfulness: Focus on the present moment to avoid spiralling into anxiety. You can focus on your senses, such as the sounds, smells or sights around you, or simply take a few deep breaths to ground yourself. Staying mindful helps you stay focused on what’s happening right then, rather than worrying about what could go wrong.
- Affirmations: Positive affirmations are a great tool to counter negative thoughts. Repeat phrases to yourself like:
- “I am good at socialising.”
- “I feel safe and comfortable here.”
- “I enjoy spending time with my friends.”
You don’t have to say these affirmations out loud, just repeat them silently in your head. This will help reinforce a positive mindset and keep anxiety at bay.
Remember to use these techniques throughout the evening, not just when anxiety is triggered. It’s much easier to stay calm if you use affirmations or mindfulness continuously, rather than waiting until you feel anxious.
After the Event: Reflect and Practice Gratitude
Once the event is over, it’s time to reflect on how it went. This is an important part of the process, as it allows you to learn from the experience and continue building your confidence.
- Reflect on the positives: Did you engage in a conversation? Did you enjoy your meal? Was there a moment you really enjoyed, like dancing or laughing with friends? Write down everything that went well, no matter how small.
- Think about the challenges: If something didn’t go as planned, take a moment to reflect on it. What could you do differently next time? Don’t dwell on mistakes – acknowledge them, learn from them, and move on.
- Practice gratitude: Write down a list of things you’re grateful for about the event. Perhaps you’re grateful for feeling comfortable or for spending quality time with friends. Gratitude helps you focus on the positive and boosts your mental wellbeing.
If you have more social events planned, like Christmas parties, you can refer back to your gratitude list and reflect on how well the last event went. This will help reinforce the idea that socialising isn’t as scary as it may seem, and you’ll be more prepared for the next one.
The More You Do It, The Easier It Gets
Finally, one of the best ways to overcome social anxiety is by practising regularly. If we avoid social situations because they make us anxious, they will only continue to feel more daunting. But if we push ourselves to socialise regularly, even with the anxiety, we gradually build up our comfort level. Over time, socialising will become easier, and you’ll start to feel more confident in social settings.
Christmas parties are the perfect opportunity to practice and build your confidence. By applying these strategies, you can approach each event feeling more at ease, which will help reduce your anxiety in the long run.
Final Thoughts
Dealing with social anxiety at Christmas parties doesn’t have to be overwhelming. By preparing in advance, visualising success, staying mindful during the event and reflecting on your experience, you can make this festive season more enjoyable and less stressful. Remember, the more you practice, the more comfortable you’ll feel in social situations.
I hope you found these tips helpful. I’d love to hear how you get on, so please feel free to comment below and share your experience with me!