As we approach the end of the year, it’s the perfect time to reflect on what went well and what didn’t. One thing that often comes up for me is confidence – how can I boost my confidence in different areas of my life? Confidence is something we can all improve and being aware of the areas where we need more confidence is the first step to making positive changes.
In this blog, I want to share a simple but powerful technique that I’ve used to build my own confidence. This exercise can help you feel more confident in social situations, but it’s versatile enough to apply to other areas of your life, like work, hobbies or even driving.
Step 1: Identify the Areas Where You Lack Confidence
The first thing I want you to do is identify the areas of your life where you want to feel more confident. Think about different situations that may cause you anxiety or discomfort. Here are a few examples:
- Social situations (e.g. parties, socialising with friends or family, work events)
- Public speaking or interacting with new people
- Hobbies and interests (e.g. trying something new or going to a class)
- Work (e.g. job interviews, presentations)
- Everyday activities (e.g. shopping, driving)
For many of us, social situations are the most common areas where we feel a lack of confidence, whether it’s going to a party, being in a bar or having to interact with people in a new environment. But this technique can be used in any area, so feel free to adapt it to your own situation.
Step 2: Visualise What It Would Be Like to Have More Confidence
Once you’ve identified an area where you want more confidence, take five minutes to think about what it would be like to feel completely confident in that situation. Let’s say you’re focusing on going to a party, imagine walking in and feeling 100% confident, with no anxiety or doubt. Think about the following in as much detail as possible:
- What does it feel like? Imagine how your body feels when you’re confident. Are you standing tall? Do you feel relaxed?
- What does it sound like? Picture the sound of your own voice speaking confidently, without hesitation or self-doubt. What do the voices of your friends or others around you sound like?
- What does it taste like? Maybe you’re having a drink or eating food. What does that taste like when you’re in a confident state of mind?
- What does it smell like? Perhaps you’re wearing your favourite perfume or maybe you’re in a room filled with the smell of delicious food. Imagine these smells adding to your sense of confidence.
- What does it look like? Picture yourself at the party. What are you wearing? How does it feel to be comfortable and confident in your outfit?
The more specific you can be, the better. The goal is to create a vivid mental image of what it would be like to feel totally at ease and confident in that situation.
Step 3: Imagine Your Body Language and Posture
Confidence also shows in your body language. Think about how you move and how you present yourself in the situation. Are you standing tall, shoulders back? Are you walking with purpose, or do you tend to slouch when you feel anxious? Also, consider your clothing. What are you wearing when you feel confident? Perhaps you’re wearing something you’d normally shy away from, like a dress or a pair of heels, but you’re confident enough to wear them without worrying.
Step 4: Visualisation
Now that you’ve broken down the situation in detail, it’s time to move on to the visualisation process. Close your eyes and imagine everything you’ve just described. See yourself walking into the party, feeling amazing, confident and completely at ease. Try to bring all of your senses into play – what do you see, hear, feel, taste and smell?
If this is your first time visualising, it might feel a bit strange at first. When I first started, I struggled to see anything at all! But with practice, visualisation becomes easier. Don’t worry if it doesn’t feel perfect straight away, just stick with it and try to visualise for five minutes every day. Over time, it’ll become easier and you’ll start to see positive changes in how you approach situations where you feel less confident.
Step 5: Repeat and Build Consistency
The more you practise visualising confidence, the better you’ll get at it. Set aside five minutes each day to go through this exercise. You can use a timer on your phone to keep track of time, so you don’t have to constantly check the clock. The key is to do it consistently, even if it feels odd at first. With time, you’ll notice a shift in how you feel in real-life situations.
For me, this exercise has been incredibly helpful in boosting my confidence. It’s helped me with everything from social events to job interviews and it’s something I’ve been practising for years. I know that if you stick with it, you’ll start seeing results too.
Final Thoughts
I hope you find this exercise as useful as I have. I’d love to hear how it works for you, so please let me know in the comments what you visualised and how it helped you.
